“To the guy in the black Civic on 270 this morning—your friend yelled ‘Jake’ at you—if you’re sitting at green lights watching your phone while traffic stacks up, you’re the reason nobody gets anywhere on time.”

“To whoever lives in the unit above me—pretty sure your name is Ashley from the packages—if you’re pacing around at midnight every night, it sounds like you’re moving furniture constantly.”

“Sat through two green lights because the first car just didn’t move. No signal, no hesitation, just completely checked out while everyone behind them waited.”

“Nothing better than someone treating the left lane like a scenic route while a line of cars builds up behind them for miles.”

“At the gas station and someone turns their car into a full concert with doors open and bass shaking everything. Everyone else just trying to get in and out.”